Sly Little Minx
by juviass
Summary: In which General Iroh realizes that agreeing to a game of Strip Pai Sho with Asami Sato is not exactly the brightest thing he's ever done.


**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Legend of Korra.**

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"For the last time, Miss Sato, _no,_" Iroh says, stressing the last word. "Now, jasmine tea, or ginseng?"

"But it's _fun_, General," Asami argues over the checkered circular table in her room. "And jasmine, please. Thank you."

Iroh shoots her a look as he brews the tea. "Strip Pai Sho is only fun for the winner."

Asami quirks an eyebrow. "Are you implying that you're horrible at Pai Sho? Or too shy to show skin?"

"Neither," Iroh says as he heats the teapot. "I just do not believe that this is a particularly good idea."

Asami gives a half-snort. "Oh please, racing around Air Temple Island in a Satomobile with the airbender kids wasn't a particularly good idea either, but we did it anyways."

"_You_ did it anyways," Iroh clarifies.

"And _you_ were in the car with me."

"Irrelevant."

"Completely relevant. You gave your consent."

"I was intoxicated!"

"We were _all_ intoxicated that night," Asami reminds him with a roll of her eyes. "We were partying because Korra defeated Amon, and I think Commander Bumi had some fun with Tenzin and spiked his drink. Which is probably why we were even able to do it in the first place."

There's a few moments of silence while Iroh sulks and pours the tea. Asami thanks him as he hands her her cup, and Iroh finally asks, with the tone of an exasperated child, "Do I have to?"

Asami's lips twitch at the question. "Well, no, you don't. But you'd be dishonouring your namesake if you didn't."

Apparently, that's all the motivation Iroh needs.

"Hand me my pieces," he says as he places the teapot on the floor. Asami does as told, and watches the General in amusement as they set up their respective sides of the board. "One item of clothing per kill, correct?"

Asami nods. "Oh course. Unless you want to increase that number, which is perfectly fine with me—"

"That's alright. You can start, Miss Sato." Asami chuckles, and slides her piece across the board.

Five moves later, the first item of clothing is shed.

"Kill," Asami announces as she hops over Iroh's piece. She picks up it and tosses it back at him. "Now strip."

Iroh plucks off his left glove and plops it on the floor beside him. He spots Asami's irked face, and sends her a teasing look. "Gloves are items of clothing, Miss Sato."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Your move," Asami grumbles, and Iroh chuckles. He scans the board once before making a kill of his own. He hands her piece back lightly, and Asami sighs. She resets the piece back on its starting point, and takes off _her_ left glove.

Iroh's lips twitch upwards, but he doesn't say anything but, "Your move."

After both of their right gloves are shed, Asami makes the next kill. Iroh shifts to take off his coat, and Asami smiles in satisfaction as she resets his piece for him. Once the UF coat is taken off, however, Asami groans.

"You're kidding. You've got _another_ coat under that?"

"It's part of the uniform," Iroh says with a shrug as he moves a centre piece up the board. Asami sighs, and proceeds to casually jump over three of his pieces. Iroh watches, dumbstruck.

"Well if you're clothed like that, then I've gotta get serious, don't I?" Asami says with a casual sip of her tea.

"How—"

"High society can get incredibly boring, as I'm sure you already know, and Strip Pai Sho is just so entertaining. Now, stop stalling and _strip_ already." She takes his UF coat and drapes it around her shoulders as Iroh unbuttons his inner jacket. "Huh, heavier than it looked," she comments absentmindedly.

"Hey, adding clothing isn't fair," the firebender protests. His jacket's finally off, and he's loosening his white scarf.

"Would you like me to help you undo your shirt, General?"

"... I'll make an exception to the rules this time," Iroh grumbles, and Asami gives him a triumphant look. When Iroh finally gets his shirt off, Asami does a once over and whistles appreciatively. Iroh flushes and fidgets.

"It's your move, General," Asami says with a sly smirk.

"You merciless minx," Iroh hisses as he slides a side piece forward.

"I'll take that as a compliment," Asami responds. She cocks her head to the side in contemplation, before picking up a piece and hovering it over one of his. Her pause confuses Iroh, but he catches on a second later.

"_No_," he says, horror evident in his voice."You _wouldn't_." Asami rethinks her decision, and ends up putting down the piece she's holding. Iroh breathes a sigh of relief. "Thank you, Miss—"

She then picks up a different piece and jumps over _two_ of his pieces. Iroh's jaw goes slack, and Asami grins. She lifts her teacup to her mouth as her eyes sweep his body. A moment later, she reports her findings.

"It seems you only have your pants and boxers left, General. Or do you wear briefs?" The heiress crosses her arms and smiles. "Oh well, I'll find out soon enough anyways."

"_Demon_," Iroh accuses, voice low. "Spawn of _Koh._"

"Strip," Asami commands, ignoring Iroh's words. Iroh gulps, but does as she commands. He sheds his pants slowly, wanting to stay clothed for as long as possible. Asami watches with a satisfied smile, and Iroh takes a deep breath as he hooks his thumbs on his black briefs and—

"Hey Asami, do you know where the keys—" Korra stops short, and looks at Iroh, then at Asami, then back at Iroh, before her face abruptly turns red and she stumbles over apologies. "Sorry, I didn't— I was only— Oh man this is so awkward—"

"No, Korra, you're misunderstanding—" Iroh flounders, but Asami cuts in.

"Actually, Korra, you came in at the perfect time," Asami says, and the spark in her eyes makes Iroh shiver. "General Iroh here is just about done, so why don't you join us? You'll be... renewing the resources."

Korra pales, and stutters, "I can't. I mean, I've never— and I have to, um, air send. I mean chair bend. I mean— bye!" The Avatar excuses herself with the grace of a turtle-duck on its back, and takes a few cautious steps out of the room before full out _sprinting_ down the corridor.

"Now," Asami says, grin widening. "I believe you still have items to remove."

Iroh gives a strangled sob and wills this day to end early.

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**Inspiration: rrdragontumblr. *com* post/28115230913/ *this-would-make-an-awesome-scene-either-in-an (Remove spaces and asterisks to view.)**

**Well, this took way longer than it should've to finish. In case you don't really understand my version of Pai Sho, here are some basic rules. So my version is modelled after Chinese checkers. The objective of the game is to get all pieces to the other side of the board. You can only move by diagonally jumping over other pieces, be it your own or your opponent's, but when your piece gets jumped over by the opposing team, it's "killed" and has to be reset. Except for the White Lotus tile but that's irrelevant.**

**Final remarks: Don't even deny wanting this to be canon, because if you don't want to see an almost-naked Iroh there is something wrong with you.**

**Thanks for reading!**


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